This past month I have been relishing the joy of not running. While many of my marathon-running peers have been experiencing the post-marathon blues (a kind of situational depression, characterised by a low-mood and perceived lack of purpose), I was blessed with post-marathon happys. It has been quite liberating to run whenever I want and to have to not adhere to training plan, to run as little or as far as I feel like, to go wherever my feet take me, and to run at whatever pace suits me at the time. After a good 6-months of tough training, getting the miles in and spending a huge amount of time on my feet, to be released from that (self-imposed) obligation has been somewhat of a revelation.
I had expected to fall victim to the ‘arrival fallacy’ (a term coined by psychologist Tal Ben-Shahar) where reaching a long-term goal results in ‘the blues’, since it was the process of growth, rather than the achievement itself, that mattered most all along> I didn’t, and I began to wonder why this was.
Firstly, I hadn’t reckoned on how much marathon training would take out of me, and how good it would feel to leave all that tiredness and lethargy behind. My lost ‘verve’ came back quickly, and for the first time in a long time, I’m not looking for the ‘next challenge’. There is no moving target, no mountain to climb, and no point to prove. Sure, I need to lose a little weight, sleep a little better, and drink a little less caffeine, but I’m not sure that will ever change. Generally, I feel great.
We have also been crazy busy. Helping Jimbo apply for university and do all the necessary paperwork, helping him get his assignments in on time (an EP in the Nu-Metal genre, listen now on Spotify!), and getting him to and from gigs with all his equipment. I was also summoned for my annual health and care assessment, my old-man 40+ review, more blood tests, and immunology clinic… all whilst working a full-time job, trying not to have a nervous breakdown, and maintain a health lifestyle in the process. Safe to say, I have been distracted. This is also the reason my blog is a few days late, but priorities and all that.
This recovery business, as with life, is all about the process. We can get it amazingly right, we can sometimes get it wrong, or we can land somewhere in the middle. I suspect we’ve all been at the extremes at one point or another, but spend most of the time knocking about in-between? For me there are no destinations, only outcomes, by-products of sustainable practices that are little wins along the way. Better sleep, a slimmer waistline, finishing the race a tired, happy mess, etc. Outcomes depend very much on the inputs, and shed-load of trial and error. Social media and commercial interests will always try to sell us the next ‘quick fix’, but there really are no substitutes for long-term, sustainable lifestyle choices that, over time, can have a big impact.
The long runs in all weathers, the aching limbs and joints, and the lonely miles when you would rather Netflix and chill were all conscious choices. The outcome was the satisfaction of running the distance, finishing happy, and feeling accomplished to boot. I also learnt a lot. I am not the athlete I used to be, I am not as young as I once was, I can’t expect the levels of endurance I used to be able to muster, and I can’t recover nearly as quickly as I used to be able to. I also learnt that I should give mind and body a break and listen to the the messages they send. The marathon was not a goal, but valuable learning stage in this strange new world of recovery and self-care I find myself in. It was another step on my recovery-journey, and I am grateful for what it’s taught me.
Making a better life for ourselves, however we go about it, is something I think we can all understand and get behind: a bespoke ‘process goal’ unique to each of us, which, if done right, will result in bonus outcomes. Like some of those lifestyle goals I mentioned. As Dave Lister said in the timeless BBC Sci-Fi comedy Red Dwarf, “Yeah well, everyone dies. You’re born & you die. The bit in the middle’s called life & that’s still to come!!”. It’s a funny old game, life. We’re all continuously growing, and the process is well and truly underway. The direction in which we choose to grow is down to us.
Laters….
#R24TRC 